Apart from being the hub of chilli growth in England, the twee market town of Berkhamsted, Hertfordshire, has many other qualities to offer its residents and visitors.
Berkhamsted lies in a beautiful valley in the South East of England between Hemel Hempstead (chavtastic) and the dreaded Tring place; only 30 miles north of London’s Oxford Circus. Surrounded by beautiful countryside the valley has a road, a canal (with its ever expanding population of American Signal crayfish) and train line passing through it, making an ideal choice for commuters to London – as evidenced by the increasing tendency to squeeze in 4 new flats where once stood a potting shed.
The Grand Union canal passing through Berkhamsted towards Waitrose.
Berkhamsted boasts some cracking family-run businesses. On Gravel Path, the east side of town, Berkhamsted has Eastwoods – the best butchers in the world, they even make chilli sausage called The Watford Stinger. In the town centre on Berkhamsted High Street we have Woods, a garden centre that caters perfectly for the local chilli growers. They oddly sell cannabis leaf shaped cuff links, probably not their best selling product.
Woods on Berkhamsted High Street, probably not its best side though.
VAH, a DIY shop on the High Street that sells every hardware product that has ever been marketed.
VAH in Berkhamsted, the chances are they will have it
Fortunately there are fewer estate agents littering the town nowadays since the downturn in the economic market, however the town does have the busiest and noisiest coffee shops in the world, hosting the local ladies knitting circles and mothers meetings. Berkhamsted also has an incredibly bizarre turnaround of boutique and nick-nack shops, which keeps the towns ladies on their toes.
Bloody typical the minute a curious girl needs a magical toy the shop goes and closes.
Berkhamsted is a sportsman’s dream. Some of the venues include the Berkhamsted Cricket Club on Kitcheners Fields, the friendly Berkhamsted Bowling Club near Canal Fields, 2 sports centres – Knox Johnston Sports centre and Sports Space and the Berkhamsted Lawn Tennis and Squash Rackets Club, where local legend tennis coach Chris Stringer helps the Berkhamsted mums out with their swinging and wrist action.
The Berkhamsted youth have their own skate park where old Burt Bailey broke two of his ribs trying to relive his best forgotten teenage years.
Berkhamsted Skate Park, not recommended for daft old people
Meanwhile Berkhamsted Town Football Club is in and out of receivership but for the younger footballer of all age groups there is Berkhamsted Raiders and Ross and Andy’s football camps. There is also an excellent community project underway, BerkoAstro, raising funds to deliver a full-sized floodlit all-weather pitch and changing facilities.
Berkhamsted is brimming with history. It has one of the oldest Motte and Bailey castle ruins in Britain, where William the Conquerer is rumoured to have deflowered many a willing young Tringite.
Berkhamsted Castle during the Great Snow Fall of 2009/2010
The Battle of Berkhamsted Common. The previous mentioned garden centre, Woods, have a slightly less illustrious history (although it was 1866 – so we should let them off) allegedly making 5 foot steel fencing which Lord Brownlow (then of Ashridge House) used in his attempts to annex Berkhamsted Common into his own private land. He would probably have succeeded were it not for the efforts of Augustus Smith MP and the Commons Preservation Society (CPS) – the CPS (now the Open Spaces Society) was an organised pressure group which deployed a series of legal and historical arguments to defend open spaces from development. Together with some burly local men and women (surely not burly women in Berkhamsted – must have been from Tring – Ed) and hired gangs from the East End, the CPS and Smith battled Brownlow’s men to retain Berkhamsted Common for the people.
The High Street charts architecture decade by decade, century by century with one of the buildings containing timbers dating back to medieval times; and thrived as a chemist in victorian times - bet they didn’t sell baby food – just like one of the current high street chemists.
Some old building on Berkhamsted High Street dated 1865
A timber framed building displaying cross swords, a popular toilet game for many fathers and sons in Berkhamsted
Alongside the private Berkhamsted School, formerly known as the Collegiate, that arguably dominates too many buildings in our town (just ask grumpy Ian – but don’t mention Waitrose, the Council or The Masons) there are many very good state/aided schools. We’re all grateful for the calibre of sixth form girls the Berkhamsted School produces, especially Notaflicker – probably best not to delve any further into that.
Berkhamsted is the only town in Hertfordshire to retain it’s Native Indian totem pole . The pole is from the good old days, long before the greedy property developers drove the Native Hertfordshire Indians from their settlements in Berkhamsted.
The Berkhamsted Totem Pole, a fine example good wood standing up to the test of time
The totem pole is situated on the bank of the Grand Union canal by Alsford Wharf, which was built on the sacred buriel grounds of the Berkhamsted Native Indians. The site is only a short distance from the fabulous historic Castle Wharf, or Port of Berkhamsted, as it is fondly known, which has shamefully fallen into disrepair since it was last occupied by Bridgewater Boats Ltd.
As you would expect of a town this size it also has its fair share of good and bad pubs and restaurants, it’s surpising how difficult it is to get a spicy pizza in Berkhamsted.
The Lamb, a great pub as long as you don’t have curly hair and bite the landlord
The Society’s favourite curryier, Farhad from The New Akash looking rather dapper
The New Akash where history repeats its self like a mini Ground Hog Day
As a cathederal defines any city a kebab shop defines a town.
77 The High Street, Berkhamsted HP4. One of the most prestigious addresses in Berko. Right next to the towns kebab shop and within stumbling distance of The Goat
The Goat public house, situated on the east side of town. It is the towns only live music venue and is the only pub in Berkhamsted which has a pool table.
The Goat, enough said
Moving along the High Street there is The Rex Cinema and The Gatsby which share an interesting art deco building dating back to 1938. The Rex is a comfortable cinema that sells alcohol, perfect. The Gatstby is fancy cocktail bar and restaurant popular with the Berkhamsted Chilli Growing Society wives. The chilli wives have noticed that The Gatsby have downgraded their Strawberry Belinis from champagne to sparkling wine and they are not amused.
The Gatsby where the Strawberry Belinis aren’t what they once were
Whatever your hobby or interest Berkhamsted will probably have a thriving society or group for you. Some of the more interesting or unusual ones include:
Of course, your hosts - The Berkhamsted Chilli Growing Society and a small selection of other groups and societies in Berkhamsted town.
- The Parrot Society
- The Bell Ringing Society
- The Berkhamsted Bowmen
- Sunnyside Allotment Society
- Berkhamsted Film Society
- Berkhamsted Round Table
- Graham Greene Birthplace Trust
- Berkhamsted Strathspey and Reel Club
- Berkhamsted & Distrcit Angling Society
Should you need your car repairing or MOTing there are several garages tucked away in some unlikely locations around Berkhamsted to choose from.
No disrespect intended to any of Berkhamsted motor engineers, except for Kwikfit (but that’s a long story of incompetence and stupidity of the highest order by Keith Pace the Kwik Fit manager so best leave that alone for now), but we think it’s worth travelling to the Bourne End and Hemel Hempstead borders to VP Autos (the one next to the Pine Shop).
Burt has been using VP Autos for centuries now and could bore you with endless tales about their excellent service, just be careful not to get him started on Kwikfit. Burt ventures all that way even though there are several garages on his doorstep, this must be a recommendation in its self, either that or he’s a daft old brush whose stuck in his ways.
If you want to try V P Autos for yourself here are their details
V P Auto Services, 559 London Road, Hemel Hempstead, HP1 2RE 01442 268 163
If you’re thinking of moving to Berkhamsted the town has it’s very own removal company S. Dell & Sons Removals which situated on the west side of town near Ronnie Sunshines, Berkhamsteds bushcraft shop, and the Berkhamsted Recycling Centre.
S. Dell Removals helping a family move to Berkhamsted
Revision 3-16/03/2010